A synopsis of Hoy

Big, Big Folds

2011-08-24T15:32:00.000-07:00

A four bet means Aces and Kings, not to mention a six bet. Learn to fold donkeys.

Here is my analysis of a hand on Goodnight moon. AJ vs KJ on a JJK board. Small 4-bet raises then the money all goes in. People not as smart as I am say this is a cooler.

Toph's 1.1 million raise says decent hand not sure where he stands. Anton's re-raise to 2 million made alarms go off in my head. Obviously you can not fold AJ there yet but my hair has dander. Toph responds correctly as I would (even though I have never been that deep in the WSOP) and re-raises. Anton see's this raise a extreme strength and pushes in. Obviously Toph is beaten here and should fold his cards face up.

Obviously this is a huge, huge fold, but now I will contradict myself and say he should never have raised in the first place which totally contradicts my prior statement that this is the right move and I would have done exactly that but ignore that please.

It took me years to figure out that I am awesome and would laydown my hand in that spot no matter what the mathematical probability says. I knew instantly AJ was behind in this spot and if Toph was half the player I was he would have folded.

SIRI

2011-08-23T06:57:00.001-07:00

I am drunk.

Poker Media Still Sitting Quietly While Full Tilt Embarrasses Us All

2011-08-16T10:26:00.002-07:00

What a bunch of masochists we all are (well not me, but I say we as a literary device, you're really the stupid masochistic bitches). Why does the poker media not question why Phil Ivy the best poker player ever owes Full Tilt 4 million bucks? Obviously they stole our money and used it as their own.

Phil Ivy wins millions regularly so why does he need a loan from Full Tilt? He obviously does not. Full Tilt just used our money for bad loans.

Do you think Humberto Brenes ever owed pokerstars millions of dollars? What about Daniel Negreanu? How about UB, those scoundrels...d'ya think Phil Hellmuth owes UB $7 million or something? You think they lent Annie Duke a couple hundy large to complete an addition on to her house? Me thinks not.

Why am I the only genius to question this loan? I don't loan professional gamblers money to throw away on Roshambo, 18 foot puts, or prop bets.

Or Do I? (Dah Dah Dah Dramatic Music)

I, the Hero of the people, sat on this story for weeks awaiting the poker media to pick it up but I can not sit back any longer! The poker media are a bunch of silly school children. I, the only adult, will tell you how it is.

Did anyone see this story in the poker media where Howard offered to pay Brunson what Brunson had locked up on Full Tilt at the time of the U.S. online poker ban? I read this in the poker media but nobody in the poker media has written about this story!

"Look who I just ran into.. I told him the wsop killed me and I was cash short...... http://lockerz.com/s/121600156"
ToddBrunson

"He asked how much I had on tilt and I told him 150k.. He said come with me. We went to his car and he opened his trunk and paid me!!!!!!"

I figured this would be covered in the poker media where I read it but instead the poker media is blowing Full Tilt pro's and not writing about it.

I hope Lederer get's carjacked. What the hell is he doing running around with 150k in his trunk. Poker pro's are getting paid out by Full Tilt with our money but we are getting nothing.

You would think someone like Pokerati would report this on July 19th, or Bill Rini on July 26th, or some poker media person but nobody at all has even mentioned this. I mean what are they afraid of getting sued for slander! It was in a tweet on the internet! Of Course it is true!

Can you imagine if a site like 2+2 had anything on this story on July 19th 2011? It would be fucking amazing if any entity did the heavy duty, hard nosed, reporting that I bring you.

Seriously guys, it's getting pretty close to where we deserve what we get here. (again not me, but I say we as a literary device, you're really the stupid fucks getting what they deserve).

Thursday Tea Party

2011-08-16T10:26:00.001-07:00

Do not drink the tea.

Wednesday Reality

2011-08-11T05:51:00.001-07:00

I was right. You all are stupid.

The Downgrade, and the Fed

2011-08-10T11:36:00.000-07:00

Do not listen to the dumb people. The rally is fake and will not hold.

The Downgrade, and the Fed

2011-08-09T12:00:00.000-07:00

This bullshit is getting to boring for me! WHAT THE FUCK HOYAZO! Have you become the goddamn New York Times. Go fuck yourself. The fucking stock market sucks. We get it. Shut the fuck up and use too many words for something halfway interesting for a change you goddamn retard.

Monday Market Mania

2011-08-09T06:22:00.000-07:00

Stock Market was fun Monday.

S&P did their fucking job finally and downgraded America.

it is hilarious to hear the president and congress say the S&P does not know what they are talking about. Congress and the president told everyone we were a day or two away from defaulting on our debt.

Obama is stupid. What the hell is Moody's and Fitch thinking?

AIG is suing **BankAmerica for bad loans. BankAmerica is a bunch of shithole but how can AIG, who invented being shitholes, possibly sue BankAmerica. AIG is a big poncy scheme. How can they sue the bank when it's their job to asses risk.

What pisses me off the most is we own AIG. Why would we allow this lawsuit to happen?

Listen to Hoy if you want to get re-elected Obama. Get on the TV right now. Tell AIG to stop this ridiculous lawsuit or we are shutting them down. Let's hope that AIG calls the presidents bluff. We can then fire all these people who only have job because we have had two pussy presidents in a row.

I would gladly lose the $180 billion I spent on AIG if we could fire all those 63,000 assholes tomorrow.

** DISCLAIMER: I do not have a ton of shares in BankAmerica, nor have I sucked any BankAmerica employees dicks... recently.

Stock Market Redux

2011-08-05T06:06:00.000-07:00

I am a ballah and own a Sirius Satellite Radio. It has been a while since I listened to Financial news on the ride to work. New York is interested in how the stock market does.

Smart people like me knew the stock market was sick and would drop 500 points. Growth sucks. Let me impress you with other peoples numbers.

I am so smart this could be a Financial Blog or a Political blog. However I just want to write about poker. Obama is a sucky leader. All he does is implement fail policies and print funny money.

I am not here to bash Obama. I am here to tell you how genius I am. People are finally listening to what I have been saying for years. Politicians suck.

The world is going to be forced to spend less and raise taxes. Unemployment will stay at 17% because there are too many workers.

Like it or not things have changed. Obama just printed more money which weakened the dollar. We will be paying $4 for a gallon of gas and $12 for a movie. I have analyzed everything and we are in for the next great depression.

hmmm.

What a Difference Success Makes

2011-08-02T07:58:00.000-07:00

Airport security sucks. I am a bandwagon Phillies fan. When they sucked I was embarrassed to wear the cap but now that they are good I stride about like a peacock. Colorado Rockies and Padres are beneath contempt.

Kids are a PITA. Burly TSA guard hates the Phillies. The Phillie's have gone from lifelong sad sacks to the envy of the entire world.

In Florida I wore my ratty old hat. It is a hundred degrees and my Adonis body is sweating in the heat as I carry 22 bags by myself. Skycap guy persecutes me for being a Phillies fan. Least the Marlins suck. I personally helped my team win five NL East championships.

My sister requested salad dressing and the heathen National's fan cook forgot it. He tried to match wits with me but I am unbeatable.

Three people mouthed off at me in under a month (I assume this is sports related only and not the normal trash Talking Hoy must get). The Phillies are the best team ever!

(title unknown)

2011-07-28T14:55:00.000-07:00

A quarter is 3 months. ***

*** Apparently Hoyazo created this genius post then deleted it. So I assume that soon we will have another post about quarters and months and possibly dimes and nickles, who the fuck knows with that guy.

Main Event Busto

2011-07-19T10:32:00.000-07:00

Twenty two players left none of them interest a connoisseur of poker like myself.

My blogging buddy Andrew Brokos busted then Erick Lindgren one of the only remaining names the common man like yourselves would know was out.

Erika Moutinho and David Sands still interested me because they were shacking up. If you knew math as good as me you would understand how unbelievable this is. Shame on Jack Eiffel for allowing these two to collude by sharing cards with each other.

Once they busted I had no interest. You poor people might get off on watching some unknown morons win 8 million bucks but it does not excite me. Do not even get me started on what a horrible idea the November Nine is.

Thus ends the first WSOP I have missed since 2006, if you had my bucks you could play the WSOP too. I did not miss it at all. I played at Foxwoods in one of their big tourneys. In 2012 there will be less people because all these internet wannabe's will be brokeback. I shall make my triumphant return to the WSOP then.

The Main Event

2011-07-13T06:07:00.000-07:00

Main event is great internet lurking event. March Madness is better TV event.

First one I followed was Raymer's run. Namedrop the blogfather. I am connected. Lurked the internet to see Helmouth Explode, Moon bluff, Ivy play. I care about the game which is why I play on Ultimate Bet.

Robert Varkonyi and I are buddies. He is still in it. Doyle Brunson sucks. Todd is doing good. E-Dog Erick Lindgren doing good. See how hip I am. Watching Carlos Mortensen, Patrik Antonius, Darvin Moon. Thomas Fuller and Terrance Chan my blog friends are doing very well also. I am connected. Fanboy says Yay Moon!

Shaun Deeb 300k, Peter Feldman doing well. Us on the inside know him as Nordberg from the old days in the hood. Miami John, Andrew Brokos, Tom McEvoy. Eli Elezra. See how much I know about poker?

The main event is good.

Now That is a Horribad Call

2011-07-08T06:23:00.000-07:00

Josh Ariah Sucks. He should not even be called a pro. Calling off a huge raise like that is a fish move. He was tilted from losing the other day. I would never do anything like that because I am smart.

It seems like the WSOP will have 5000 people.

Is it me?

2011-07-01T11:22:00.000-07:00

Full Tilt Red Pros suck. Ivey who did not even show up does not have a bracelet this year. Juanda only has one bracelet. What a poser. The pro's are too busy kissing their asses goodbye. If you liked this post you will love my one on how Bums on the street are genetically inferior to normal people because they get sick all the time.

Synopsis of Hoyazo

2011-06-30T10:51:00.001-07:00

Redux! The Synopsis of Hoy shall save your eyeballs from bleeding. Stay tuned for future updates.

A new author added

2011-06-30T10:48:00.000-07:00

Synopsis of Hoy will go in a whole new direction.

Waffles has been added as author!

A piece of my soul may have just died.

The Buddy and the BBT

2010-04-21T12:35:00.000-07:00

What Waffle's said but let's call it the Buddy instead of the Dank!

But without Hoy tonight.

Hoy Wins Mookie

2009-04-17T15:22:00.000-07:00

PushMonkey and MaggieO did the heavy lifting eliminating many nemesi with retarded beats. Meanwhile aggresive Hoyazo play had secured many chips early and a healthy enough stack to capture many more chips as the well named pushmonkey and fellow member of sucko genepool MaggieO spewed chips late leading to the greatest title in poker finally being bestowed after 7 years of futility.

The Sun now shines brighter, the birds sing louder and amazingly enough the ego has grown.

Farewell (to ethics)

2009-01-09T15:34:00.000-08:00

After a year long run, I think the time has come to retire the Synopsis of Hoy.

I have stated my opinion tha Hoy should identify "outright cheaters, colluders, chip dumpers" if you have solid case. Hoy has respectfully disagreed. We have not discussed in detail and I am willing to accept that Hoy the poker player/blogger may have a reasonable basis but that Hoy the lawyer does not want to libel or slander.

The one person that has been "identified" as a chip dumper is waffles. He had quite a passionate rant about:

"Next thing I know Hoyazo is accusing me of dumping chips to Mookie. All I can assume is that a multi accounter that cheats and plays on a cheater site must think everyone is as corrupt as he is. Fucking retarded bastard. I am really insulted that he thinks I would cheat for Mookie. I am more than willing to admit it was a bad call but I had no thoughts of helping Mookie in either hand. I had a lot of fun laughing at Hoyazo stacking off with top pair but I did not make the float call for Mookie either.

I guess I can understand a morally corrupt person thinking everyone else is as rotten as he is but I hate that fucking shit. Perhaps I am being hard on Hoyazo. I have defended him in the past for some of his somewhat shady moves. I really thought he was a good guy and gave him the benefit of the doubt. I guess you guys were probably right though. Just another long line of scumbags who assumes everyone is like them."

We all know that waffles plays stupidly which leads to busting. Moronic waffles play lead to backers for the wind up the monkey entertainment value.

This week Waffles accepted backing from Donkette to play in the Mookie.

I have been annoyed for the 2 days since learning this with intermittent periods of pissed.

I understand many -EV plays led to Donkette "needing" to "borrow" and staking a break even player is just another example but for her I would suggest going to oprah.com and downloading Suze Orman's new book for free.

The question I have is waffle's at same level of ethics as donkette for taking money from her when she owes other people money?

Another MTT Score

2008-12-30T11:45:00.000-08:00

100th Synopsis.

Lacking reasonable shame or remorse Hoy lucksacked his wayto a 3rd in UltimateBet tourney.

Clearly the shameless pimping of UB has caught the superusers attention and they are tweaking RNG in Hoy's favor.

comments

Betting on the Bodonkey

2008-12-18T16:02:00.000-08:00

Bet Field at 4:1 (which includes Hoy)
Bet Don at 8:1
or bet Chad at a ridonkulous 10:1 (Seriously how is he longshot)

Feels like an Asshat kind of evening.

Auto Industry

2008-11-18T09:53:00.000-08:00

Big 3 are poorly run companies no amount of money can save as structured.

US can still not let them go under but drive them to make structural changes to look more like Toyota and Honda and DEMAND a more fuel efficient fleet in exchange for money.

Assistant's note: Filled up Prius on way to work this morning, drove 458 miles since last fill up and needed 8.8 gallons.

FTOPS Main Event

2008-11-17T11:52:00.000-08:00

Getting two outed at river sucks.

Woe is me

Credit Where Credit is due

2008-10-14T13:33:00.000-07:00

Massive ego now believes the Hoyazo bat is more important than the Phillies bat in determining Phillies playoff destiny.

And make no mistake, Hammer Wife knows that the Phillies need 20 seconds of her time for game 5 on Wednesday.

comments

Bailout Voters

2008-10-06T14:12:00.000-07:00

Bank's balance sheets get relief.

Market does not care.

These fuckers caved.

The Assistant is moving to Fremont.

Rep. Pete Stark, D-Fremont, voted "no" twice:

"I recently read in the press that 8 out of 10 of my colleagues know nothing about economics or banking. This bill shows that account is quite right. This bill does nothing but bail out Wall Street and large corporate America. It spends $800 billion that taxpayers will end up having to pay for and it does nothing for middle-income Americans."

Unbelievable

2008-10-01T10:21:00.000-07:00

These fuckers!

Washington Donkery Rant

2008-09-30T09:27:00.000-07:00

House of Representatives found some cajones.

Markets tanked because no bailout = panic.

President Bush told American public no bailout = financial disaster.

Enough members of public believed to panic sell.

There is no inter-bank credit so something has to be done but enough representatives want to find palatable solution because they realize they represent their constituencies and average joe is not seeing mortgage relief from yesterday's plan.

Lehman R.I.P.

2008-09-15T09:58:00.000-07:00

Today is final day of synopsis being a Lehman or financial blog.

It is the way of a capitalistic society to let a weaker company fail, even if the weakness comes from bad leadership at the top.

Saving grace of bankruptcy is golden parachutes for CEOs are eliminated.

No Utility Today

2008-09-09T12:34:00.000-07:00

Lehman top Managment has not shown competence required during mortgage crisis to be placed in charge of a Lemonade stand.

Mookie Recap

2008-08-14T15:18:00.000-07:00

Congrats to NYRambler for taking down the Mookie. It was clear after he eliminated me calling off most of his chips with Top pair 7 kicker on 8 high flop he was destined for Mookie Glory!

Blonkaments

2008-08-01T09:32:00.000-07:00

MATH follows WWdN into retirement.

But there is always the Mookie.

2008-07-30T13:35:00.000-07:00

I am among the most pompous assiest people who ever lived.

I don't think I could make it as a professional gambler.

I blow at high stakes cash.

I'm not good enough. I'm not devoted enough. I'm not patient enough. I'm not even-keeled enough.

And unlike almost every lawyer I know, I absolutely love my day job. I mean, I really love what I do. And I'm going to move on to another company to keep doing my thing.

Notice

2008-07-28T09:35:00.000-07:00

Image

2008-07-22T12:23:00.000-07:00

Congratulations to que31dawg for taking down this week's MATH tournament in addition to the full $240 prize pool for winning the latest Shootout tournament.

10 entrants winner take all would seem to deliver verdict that PokerStars Shootout Format is superior to FullTilt Shootout Format.

Image in blonkaments has a way of feeding on itself. Loose stealy players have to make looser calls because image has led them to be played back at more.

Hand Ranges II

2008-07-21T12:02:00.000-07:00

Obie recently won a Mookie tournament, he is obviously a great player.

Month Hiatus Over

2008-07-18T13:32:00.000-07:00

Math went Shootout.

Family in the house is -EV for MTT play.

Iggy cashed in Main Event.

It is important to assign hand ranges whenever you commit chips to pot, image has a huge impact especially in blogger tournies where image have been honed over even years of playing together.

Is it profiling to say lawyers as a profession make for stealy poker players?

A birdie told me that Riggs had talked Waffles into playing PLO on Bodog, I will have to act fast to make sure I catch some of that spewage.

Hiatus

2008-06-19T16:39:00.000-07:00

I am taking a break from Synopsis until latest blogger drama blows over.

I disagree with Blinders that Hoy cheated.

I disagree with Hoy ripping Smokkee anonymously.

But Hoy has ripped my play many times, usually it is initially pissed, sometimes reaction is wtf dude that does not accurately capture how hand played out but in the end I laugh because even when I walk up to ask how the $2k NLHE is going he manages to call me a luckbox while describing the 2 outer he hit with 99 to stay alive.

MATH Recap

2008-05-27T12:43:00.000-07:00

4 of 8 ITM came from big fish pool prop bet and once again LJ ended as a bridesmaid.

Congratulations to Eric on win and condolences to LJ for not being fortunate up to be gifted a seat heads up as I was.

comments

Sunday Heads-Up, Mondays at the Hoy, and Bloggers in the FTOPS

2008-05-19T12:07:00.000-07:00

Mondays suck except for Mondays at the Hoy, 10pm ET tonight on full tilt.

Weekends are playtime with the girls.

Sunday Heads-Up seems like a keeper if some tourney kinks can be worked out.

Where were the big blogger cashes this FTOPS?

The Mookie, the Sunday Heads-Up, the BBT3 and FTOPS #20

2008-05-15T09:36:00.000-07:00

Congrats to Jerkoff Donkey (JD) Schellnut who took down the Mookie on Wednesday night, winning his second BBT3 Tournament of Champions seat in a couple of weeks.

Details of the big write-in contest for the Battle of the Blogger Tournaments III

Loretta8 has started a brand new weekly private blogger tournament, called the Sunday Heads-Up, and the first such event will be this coming Sunday evening at 9pm ET on full tilt. The password for this event is "shovemonkey".

MATH Recap

2008-05-12T21:30:00.000-07:00

Congrats to Waffles on returning from his fluky April form to gigli the MATH.

Congrats to ShabazzJenkins for taking down MATH and winning TOC seat.

Skillz is HOE.

Return Of Hoy

2008-05-05T09:45:00.000-07:00

MATH tonight, password Hammer

New product idea, produce bedwetting mattress protectors in King Size for mono.

If mono was not caught kissing a strange woman then question remains whose sweaty ass was being kissed in an attempt to climb corporate ladder. Double polygraph testing with Hammer Wife was deemed not the way to find this answer.

More chops occurred for seats and it is only outrage when Hoy does this?

BBT 3 still a great thing.

comments

Thursday Update

2008-05-01T15:20:00.000-07:00

50 word synopsis of 5000 word posts of egotistical pomposity do not write themselves.

Have there been TV stories of rescue workers in New York trying to extract a man with a 500 lb ego from his apartment in New York?

Still Feeling Bad

2008-04-25T10:53:00.000-07:00

Day 2 sick as dog.

Barf

Still Running Gooooood

2008-04-23T11:40:00.000-07:00

4th final table of last 5 BBT3 events. Waffles will soon be overtaken for April $2k seat.

Key is not good cards but people making terrible plays against allowing a big stack to amass.

And a recap from yesterday:
Read was PirateLawyer was being a stealy bitch from SB, read was air, and he weakly folded a boat to Ace high on the river.

comments

MATH Recap, Running Good and a Hand With PirateLawyer

2008-04-22T11:52:00.000-07:00

64 runners, Hoy at FT with chips, suckout by Bone_Daddy84, bad steals and done for 6th.
Congrats to wormmsu for win and EARNING a TOC seat.

During MATH PirateLawyer was pwned for a large pot and folded a boat on river.
Tomorrow will show what he folded against.

The Blonkaments and the BBT

2008-04-21T10:57:00.000-07:00

I am an egomaniac. I'm a pompous ass. It's like my defining characteristic.

MATH tonight, 10 pm Eastern, password: Hammer

8 out of the last 12 months our private blogger-hosted tournaments have been part of the week-to-week competition of the BBT. This sucks and takes away from the spirit of blogger games.

comments

BBT Chops

2008-04-18T12:34:00.000-07:00

I, Hoyazo, have single handedly ruined poker bloggery and turned it into the drivel that it has become today.

I have done something to bloggers, to blogging, to Poker, ruining the spirit of our games.

One thing is clear. Some people have clearly lost their way and are completely missing the spirit of the BBT and the private blogger tournaments. I guess the exact identity of those people we can disagree on.

comments

Back to the BBT3

2008-04-17T12:04:00.000-07:00

$T rocks.

"I definitely believe the Tournament of Champions is more interesting and just better with me in it."

"Even if my BBT3 "win" was really just handed to me wrongly. Muhahahahahahahahahahah!"

Blogging Anonymity, and MATH Recap

2008-04-15T09:00:00.000-07:00

No pics, no hints of who I am, your only clues are Crazy Asian LAG due to Japanese id.

MATH Final table:
6. $92.40 Loretta8
5. $134.40 Martyr99
4. $184.80 pvanharibo
3. $243.60 pureprophet
2. $352.80 hellory
1. $554.40 iam23skidoo
and big props to skiddoo for winning TOC seat.

Reining It In Late in Tournaments

2008-04-14T13:42:00.000-07:00

Lesson from last week of poker, don't push too hard late.

Ring Turbo SNG Strategy -- Part 2

2008-04-11T12:00:00.000-07:00

Too tilted from K rag sooted suckout against 77 at Riverchasers FT to have part 2.

Of course the lucksack went on to win, congrats on TOC seat.

Donkin' It Up in the Mookie

2008-04-10T10:11:00.000-07:00

4th place for $97 while playing like an ass the entire night.

**PS just FYI, there is a bigger idiot.

comments

Ring Turbo SNG Strategy -- Part 1

2008-04-09T10:25:00.000-07:00

If MY STRATEGY does not work for you all money for class will be refunded, don't come crying to me about your actual losses in Turbo SNGs.

Play tighter than normal MTT game early.
If you are in lower part of raising range for position and get reraised fold.
3x BB bet is raise until you are down to 10x BB stack.

When down to 5x BB jamming range opens up. Late postion ATC open jams.

Part 2 Friday due to lengthy post about 1st glorious victory in Mookie.

comments

MATH Recap, and One Thing I Love About Poker

2008-04-08T10:04:00.000-07:00

Congrats to PokahDave for taking down the MATH.

My name is Hoy and I am a masochist. It's why I love poker.

comments

Keeping It Real With the BBT3

2008-04-04T11:33:00.000-07:00

Chat obnoxiousness is at acceptable levels.

Play in non NLHE events has improved from god awful to merely copious levels of donkery.

But people are improving and this is good.

There are still donkeycalls on flop with AJ unimproved in NLHE but for the most part people are taking it seriously.

Booooooooooms! are stupid. But they are not rude.

Variance happens and being the one currently running badly leads to greater sensitivity, periods of running bad are part of game.

comments

WPBT Getting Closer

2008-04-02T14:43:00.000-07:00

Another new name won skills.

We know bloggers suck asses at poker.

Prepping 6-Max tourney game for WPBT weekend.

comments

MATH Recap, and BBT3 One Month Review

2008-04-01T12:54:00.000-07:00

J8o called allin reraise and the host exits MATH.

Congrats to Breeze81 on win and TOC seat win.

Other cashers of note:
7. $54.60 pokerdad13
6. $85.80 mattazuma
5. $124.80 willwonka
4. $171.60 tilt away
3. $226.20 Astin
2. $327.60 Roberto551

1st Month of BBT3 (1/3 point) has passed.
Summary: sucked large anus

Skillz is Limit O8, donkorific times await.

comments

Setup or Stoopid?

2008-03-31T09:46:00.000-07:00

Julius Goat flopped a boat against flopped trips, do I have to go broke on hand.

MATH at 10 EST
PW hammer

comments

Credit Card Mania

2008-03-27T09:56:00.001-07:00

Part 1 of Story I can't do justice to abbreviating.

Congrats to Tilt Away in Razz and Hellory in Mookie.

Lost in Riverchasers tonight

Small Field vs Big Field Mtts

2008-03-26T12:14:00.000-07:00

I suck at blonkaments. (especially the Mookie).

MATH Recap, and Semi-Bluffing on the Flop

2008-03-25T13:14:00.000-07:00

corron10 won the math.

A little self control is called for when semi-bluffing.

It is better to semi-bluff a ragged flop than a flop that has big cards that the blackjack donkeys play.

An example, deep stacked cash sitting in CO with JT.

EP raises to 7, you in CO call, SB calls.

Flop is K Q small rainbow.

SB checks, initial raiser checks.

It is great flop for your hand (but not as good as 98). Semi-bluff here has issues because the big cards are likely cards for SB to have called with or initial raiser to have hit 1.

Turn 9, patience is rewarded and you have hit the "better straight". Now turn bet is called by SB initial raiser folds and you take down a pot where SB can not fold top 2 pair.

comments

The Law Chica Scores Again, and Single Stacks vs Double Stacks

2008-03-24T10:41:00.000-07:00

Congrats to lawchica for 2nd in 32k and Smokkee for his 3rd in 40k. (apparently you need a $5k+ score to rate a Hoy shout out anymore).

:)

Mookie change back to single stacks means you have to change your approach. Splashing around for 1/10th of stack with 97s can lead to becoming shorty early. By end of 1st hour raising a pot can mean you are pot committed.

comments

Wii is Key

2008-03-19T12:28:00.001-07:00

Wii Homerun Hitting during breaks (4th on) is key to going deep in 50-50.

Mookie futility continues at 10 ET despite playing on other's dime.

Shitty Bracelet Race Schedule, and Cash Hand Concluded

2008-03-17T09:36:00.000-07:00

MATH 10 ET pw Hammer.

Bracelet Races schedule fawked the United States customers off, hard!

KQ hand they really tried to hose me by making me actually go from way ahead to way behind for a $565 pot on the turn there, before the river resuck made all right in the world again. Now if I don't hit the Queen on the river, is anybody possibly getting away from this hand at the end?

comments

Bad Day, Still Feelin Good

2008-03-13T10:16:00.000-07:00

Wednesday was for losing.

Tilt 50-50 AA loses to KK 8 minutes in all in pre.

Stars 50-50 2.5 hours in lost a coinflip, top 20 stack with win, instead out.

Mookie A9 loses to A4 on A94 flop thanks to rivered 4. Congrats to Lucko for win.

"I knew when I got seated at a starting table with The Slowplay King that my time in this thing would be short. " A few minutes in Bayne pwned AGAIN.

comments

MATH Recap, and WSOP / WPBT Summer 2008

2008-03-11T12:13:00.000-07:00

Congrats to Lucko for running over MATH.

When should WPBT Summer gathering be?

Skillz and Bodonkey tonight.

comments

More Elements of Poker

2008-03-10T10:50:00.000-07:00

Week 2 of BBT3 kicks off with the MATH 10:00 eastern.

There are no streaks in poker. Ed. note after watching the assistant's run at end of BBT one doe Hoy even believe this?

Folding face up shows a lack of self confidence in game.

If you want to make a mistake with a misclick then CHAT.

Mid-Game Tournament Question Revisited

2008-03-05T14:05:00.000-08:00

Congrats to corron10 for taking down this week's Skills Series in Stud Hi.

Racing for my stack with 1/3 of field left is a short stacks move. As big stack I want to preserve and accumulate in sits where I know I am favorite.

Limping KQs is not terrible despite popular sentiment.

MATH Recap

2008-03-04T12:07:00.000-08:00

100+ runners Columbo won.
Zero lawyers cashed this week but 5 players previously on Moneyboard cashed.

Here is hand history:
BB (5s8s)
CO (KsQs)
Flop is 3s4s6h
they get all in as two biggest table stacks.

Are both/either donkeys?

MATH tonight

2008-03-02T23:24:00.000-08:00

The well named Scott Fischman was the winner of 1st TOC seat. A greater example of calling station, and flop hitting has not been seen since the performance of the orignal BBT champ.

Field was whopping 105 for Big Game.

One can only imafine how many will show up at MATH tonight
10 Eastern
PW Hammer

Preflop Raise Sizing -- Take II

2008-02-28T14:43:00.000-08:00

This is not fact but opinion.

Raise to give callers 1.5:1 pot odds in MTT.

If there are limpers ahead a better hand is required to raise (ATo mucked) but raise is increased by amount of limps.

Reraise resteals should be pot sized unless you become pot committed then reraise jam.

Preflop Raising Sizing in MTTs

2008-02-27T15:32:00.000-08:00

Apologies.

I have finally gotten software support at work and have found recently that even I don't have time to read a whole Hoy post. Especially when he publishes after my lunch time.

When raising pre-flop choose a raise size to give BB 1.5:1 odds to call.

Almost No Poker Content

2008-02-21T12:16:00.000-08:00

Fucking Surflexus won his seventh fucking Mookie tournament last night.

Job was looking better Monday, now it sucks.

Boss being eunuch is reason.

comments

Mooke Curse

2008-02-14T15:20:00.000-08:00

Winning the Mookie basically means you are a luckdonk suckbox idiot. Congratulations to Emptyman for being the latest to prove he sucks at poker.

Chat ban is unfair if I can not get ban.

Lost yawn.

comments

3rd in 50-50

2008-02-12T16:32:00.001-08:00

Today you have to read the whole post:

Congrats to Hoy for his 3rd for ~$5k in 50-50.

Reversal of Fortune

2008-02-11T17:44:00.000-08:00

Sorry for late posting, left work with sinus headache this morning.

It is 3 degress in NY brrrr, 67 in San Jose.

Tilt has lifted, it's a miracle. Cashed in FTOPS 9 despite AA being cracked by a turned set two hands in. Congrats to Chad for 35th! Played 7 SNG Sunday with 7 cashes. The mood has lifted.

Lesson of the Day:
When you get caught stealing just admit you got caught stealing and fold when you obviously get caught and are holding a hand that is quite likely dominated and almost surely behind

Tonight is 6 Max NLHE tonight with the MATH and FTOPS 10. Wish Hoy and Bayne and any other bloggers playing luck.

comments

Tilt Continues

2008-02-08T10:26:00.000-08:00

Tilt sucks, need to turn it around tonight or Event #9.

Even Chad tilts:

Dealer: Aaron Bartley shows 8,7,6,3,2
Dealer: cracknaces shows 7,6,4,2,A
Dealer: cracknaces wins the pot (3,398) with 7,6,4,2,A
Dealer: Hand #5165521026
cracknaces: just for you Bartley
Aaron Bartley: now THATS bad
cracknaces: fight fire wirh fire, how does it feel to be donked?
Aaron Bartley: shrug, thanks for trying

That pretty much made my night. Bartley is about as bad a HORSE player as there is among the ftp "pros".

comments

FTOPS begins

2008-02-07T12:52:00.000-08:00

Wednesday Poker sucked.

Congratulations to Joe Speaker who cashed in 344th place for $436 in FTOPS 1.

MookDay

2008-02-06T11:52:00.000-08:00

Futile quest for a Mook title continues today.

"Skillz" series saw Waffles blow a 6:1 chip lead and prospect of bonus prizes that would make his head explode to ANIguy. It is now clear to me that knowing how to play the skill game of the evening is a liability in the blogger skill fests.

Pokerstars players are worse, riverbeats are worse, User Interface lack of "bet pot" button is terrible oversight, last hand functionality sucks but the folded hand and mtt sats sgutting down on bubble break is better.

comments

MATH Recap

2008-02-05T11:27:00.000-08:00

Congrats to the Cashers:

1. $288 -- Tripjax
2. $216 -- astin
3. $144 -- pureprophet
4. $72 -- Pirate Wes

Pokerstars still has awful players who will lay awful beats.

Psychic Monday

2008-02-03T21:21:00.000-08:00

Congrats to Giants for knocking off the Cheatriots in Super Bowl.
Obviously with weekend revelations that Patriots era began with taping walk thru of Rams in 1999 Super Bowl some kharmic payback was in order.

MATH is tonight 6-Max NLHE on FullTilt 10 eastern.

Friday Musings

2008-02-01T11:38:00.000-08:00

Congrats to donkette for taking down riverchasers.

Lost yawn

This is a post dammit, the collection of individual posts comprise the blog, get it right people.

Surf owns Mookie

2008-01-31T11:19:00.000-08:00

Surf won his 6th Mookie and denied Mookie his 1st win HU.

yada yada yada, analysis of who wins each blonkament.

It takes aggression or ability to exploit aggros to win MATH.

It takes playing tight to win skills.

Winning Mookie is all luck it is only possible explanation for why Hoy has not won.

Winning Riverchasers takes the extreme skill to exploit drunken donkeys playing from bars.

Definition of "sucking out" is expanded to include situations where button raising with 89s and Hoy hits middle pair against opponent (ex Bayne) hits top pair. It matters not that 89 was behind whole hand, it is suckout when aggro raises weak and hits weakly enough to get in trouble.

PLH Skillz, and Buddydank Radio

2008-01-30T11:20:00.000-08:00

Congrats to Buddy Dank for winning skillz PLH!

Asshat Frat Crew will again be on MD IT Radio tonight broadcasting from the Mookie.

Let's get more than 50 listeners:
First off! BuddyDank Radio is here!

MATH Recap, and Monsters on the Flop

2008-01-29T12:10:00.000-08:00

MATH 39 runners, fuel wins.

Look for big turnout on bodog and in skill series tonight.

When you are pre-flop aggressor, oop caller rarely bets out when he flops a monster unless he is donkey or tricky.

comments

Sunday Bloody Sunday

2008-01-28T11:43:00.000-08:00

Flopped overboat and ran into flopped quads, RNG has sick sense of humor on Sundays.

Haters would disgaree but calling an all in with 2:1 chip lead HU with 66 is bad poker when playing a 1 seat tourney.

MATH tonight.

comments

On Poker Blogging

2008-01-25T09:34:00.000-08:00

Congrats to Surflexus for taking down Riverchasers Razz and to Gary Cox for following up is Skill Game Razz win with a 2nd.

Congrats to LJ for her 2nd in PokerStars $25k netting a little more than $4 large. Enjoy it and make sure to stop by LJ's blog and tell her how much you love her!

Luck is a badge of honor, you should own it!

Aggro and Loose are styles not insults.

This blog is used to analyze in odds based unbiased fashion amd present honest OPINIONS on play, every effort will be made in coming year to lessen hurt of other party in hand.

comments

Live on Wednesday Night

2008-01-24T09:44:00.000-08:00

Cpngrats to OMGitsPokerfool for 2nd in MATH and taking down 1st 2 pushfests and a controversial tie in 3rd.

Congrats to Byron on win.

That being said:

HoySynopsis will be shut down until someone attempts an explanation to justify why table speed is a factor in a last shorter bet and having multiple people bust out 1st hand is not a tie and table speed in a last longer bet (with required pushing) is not allowed to factor in while table changes (and positioning) decide these quite frequently.

Blogger Tournament Nirvana

2008-01-23T10:10:00.000-08:00

Cutting edge developments in O8 starting hand selection and post flop play were on display in Skillz game last night. Congratulations to LJ and to Rake Feeder for chopping.

Recovered from early setup hand when evil assistant flopped overboat against trips and 2 additional big bets were lost when turn brought smaller boat. To quote Drizz "Omaha 303: How to fold a boat". Eventually one of the new starting hands wore me down and IGH middle of pack.

We are at height of blogger tournament. Every Night of week there is a game, numbers are outstanding even without BBT in progress, even on Bodog.

Tonight is Mookie, watch for more futility.

Eyes have tells.

comments

MATH Recap, and Losing with Effing Aces

2008-01-22T09:02:00.000-08:00

I know how to play the hammer, you donkeys don't! Fawk you when you suck out on me after being pwned.

AA losing to KK sucks.

Congratulations to Surf for winning MATH.

Weekend pimps:
Congrats to LJ for taking down a $200 live tourney for 12 large.
Visit CK to learn O8 nuances before tonight's skill series O8.
Visit Wes to learn if the NHL really still exists.

Will play on PokerStars more until FullTilt provides a little personal something for previous free shilling.

comments

Holiday Monday Post

2008-01-21T10:16:00.000-08:00

Stock market is closed and the bond market is closed, day off w00t.

Miami Don big winner from Sunday, wins Blogger HORSE, 4 way chops Big Game with Vinnay, Cracknaces and the luckbox.

BDR had excellent poker discussion.

MATH tonight password hammer.

comments

I Think

2008-01-18T10:03:00.000-08:00

a lot.

comments

Decent Mookie Run, Avatar Races are Back, and Jec is Out

2008-01-17T13:14:00.000-08:00

Mookie and Hoy at same Mookie final table, curse continued Numbbono won.

Tonight on Full Tilt at 6 ET Limit Avatar Race is HORSE.

FCD eliminated BBTwo champion jeciimd in Aussie Millions (fawking Aussies are optimistic and believe they will get there even with 35s).

See you tonight at the Riverchasers at 9pm ET, and at the token frenzy at 9:45!

Blogger Razz, and More on the FTOPS

2008-01-16T11:48:00.000-08:00

Congrats to Gary Cox for winning razz "skill".

Many sick rundowns were seen in blogger razz.

Today is Mookday, fire up Buddydank Radio and listen to IT and MiamiDon regale with tales of Mook and Hoy futility.

Everyone get into this coming Sunday night's Big Game.

jeciimd should resume the action for Day 2 of the Aussie Millions today, last year money bubble broke at end of day 2, play your game jec.

FTOPS is ahead w00t.

comments

MATH and FTOPS

2008-01-15T12:49:00.000-08:00

FTOPS #10 here I come.
Key hand 97s raised from button cracked AA in BB when he smooth called, 996 flop was sweet.

Key point in satellite strategy is steal when short, jam when you think you are ahead as shorty or medium stack but protect your chips in marginal situations when solidly in qualifying position.

Here are this week's cashers in Mondays at the Hoy:
1. $297.60 twoblackaces
2. $171.12 surflexus
3. $119.04 VinNay
4. $89.28 bartonf
5. $66.96 hoyazo w00t

MATH & FTOPS

2008-01-14T11:37:00.000-08:00

6-max MATH tournament at 10pm ET:
password: hammer

FTOPS VI is coming Feb 6.

3 seats down, love the $40-$75 buy-in sats

As special aside owned this PLO donkey HU for FTOPS 2 seat.

comments

5th Riverchasers Win

2008-01-11T13:02:00.000-08:00

Donkette won $20 from waffles for win.

Sucked out on waffles.

Hit my draws.

Became massive chipleader on 3 way all in pre with 7% expected equity.

Won biggest O8 cash of career.

comments